Themed Cardio Tennis Clinics in the Fort Lauderdale Area
A band of towelling with no mechanism to speak of. Cotton, nylon and a trace of rubber, one width for everybody; the prepared route begins in Villach, and I have the script here somewhere, but do ask me about the Roman road.
Head Tennis Headband: Ladies and gentlemen, we now proceed with suitable composure to the Hauptplatz, where a pillory stands in the middle of the square. Please admire the headband’s poise near civic discipline; honestly, if textiles could look innocent, this one would be overacting.
Head Tennis Headband: Before us is St James's parish church, first recorded in 1136, a date I shall deliver calmly despite wanting to underline it three times. The headband, meanwhile, has arrived centuries late and still expects a special exhibition label.
Head Tennis Headband: We pause at the bridge over the Drava into the old town, a crossing that makes geography feel very well organized. And there sits the headband, behaving as though it personally negotiated passage across the river.
Head Tennis Headband: Here at Warmbad, the Roman road preserves paving left from a wayside station, which is the sort of phrase that makes curators stand a little taller. The headband is pretending to be an artifact; I regret to report it is extremely convincing from three paces away.
If you will gather round. Our first object is a tennis headband, and I shall deliver the standard description, which is short, because the object is honest. It is made of terry loop fabric. The composition is 80 per cent cotton, 15 per cent nylon and 5 per cent rubber, and it is one size, fitting all. Thank you.
A word on why those three fibres and not others, since we have a moment. The cotton is the absorbent element — a looped terry pile presents far more surface area than a flat weave, which is precisely why towels are made this way and why a smooth headband simply pushes the sweat sideways.
The nylon is the structural element, resisting the slow stretch that turns a headband into a bracelet by August. And the rubber is the retentive element, providing the grip that keeps it seated at the hairline through a long rally. Three fibres, three jobs, no fastening, nothing to fail.
In a collection full of complicated objects, I have a great deal of time for a simple one.
Out at Warmbad there is a stretch of Roman road — actual paving, left from a wayside station on the route over the pass — and you can put your hand on it. Not behind glass. Not roped. The same stones, in the same place, where people stopped, drank the warm water coming out of the ground, and went on.
Which brings us to Villach, and here I am afraid I go rather off the script.
Two thousand years of people arriving at that spot for exactly the same reason. I have led this tour a great many times and that is still the part where I stop talking.
You will wear this everywhere from a summer clinic to a match in the heat, and it is also perfect for the town's Kirchtag in August, when the whole place comes out in tracht for the largest folk festival in the country.
The simplest object in the case is usually the one that never had to be redesigned.
